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Are there any good songs about life being a highway? And riding it all night long?

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i bet if i gave money to those guys ringing bells out in front of the store, they’ll just waste it, they waste the money on more bells

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The first rule of procrastination club is… to be covered in the next meeting.

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Telling bad turkey jokes, & i won’t stop!So that’s our Thanksgiving at iHop!

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If you put a feather in your hat, why on earth would you name it macaroni?

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What happened to the #1 pencil?

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Did they purposely make dyslexia hard to spell?

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Warm bodies i sense, are not machines that can only make money

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Do you remember back in the day before they called it a “selfie”,& it was called “no one else wants to take your picture” – ?

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Aw man… sad to hear Stan Lee is gone. Excelsior!

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Anyone here in fake book land ever had the experience of a car tire jack opening up to full height & then becoming stuck that way, never to collapse again?

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Never expected something from YouTube to spawn a tv show… Sandra Lee-aka Dr. Pimple popper. Ew.

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Q: Why does the Mummy never take a vacation? A: He doesn’t want to unwind.

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Q: Why did Dracula drink cold medicine? A: Coffin

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Q: How do you fix a broken pumpkin? A: Pumpkin patch!

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i have decided “who is this clown?” is the most horrible thing you can say to anyone. Not only because it implies they are a clown, but an unknown clown.

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Feels like fall finally fell! High of 70? i’ll take it!

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So how many zombies would rob zombie rob, if rob zombie could rob zombies? 🧟‍♀️ 🧟‍♂️ 🧟‍♀️

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October 17, 2018 at 01:35PM

Regarding my upcoming purge.

My new account for Art and Music will be here:
https://ift.tt/2PM4BEw

If you want to follow me as an artist, musician, capper, piler, etc. then send requests there. Because I am shutting this account down completely on November 1st and am setting up a new personal one for friends and family with no connection whatsoever to my other half. We will, for all intents and purposes, be two distinct people unconnected in any way.


Kinda gave a coworker a bit of a hard time about going on a trip where there’s gonna be gambling involved. It’s not like i think that’s really terrible, spend your money how you want… but you never beat “the house.” Kind of a waste of time, was my point. As i look down at my phone… where i play candy crush.

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Y’all can be *woke* imma be sleep!

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“I can’t stand stuck up bodies of water. It’s like, get over yourself Lake Superior!”

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Just here to give you a glimmer of nope.

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